Wednesday, October 24, 2012

True Confessions - The Great Flamingo Caper

Okay, It's time to come clean about Flo, Mingo and CoCo. As I said in the last post we had acquired them which is true, just sort of in a misdemeanor kind of way.

First of all, I want to go on the record right here that I had nothing to do with it. It was all Margo. I'm going to sing like a bird right here all over the internet for immunity from prosecution.

Here's how it went down. Our good friends (well, maybe not so "good" anymore) Dawn and Ted left on vacation a few weeks back to visit family in Pennsylvania. This is the same Dawn and Ted who had our back when we blew out a tire on LuLu coming back from Orlando earlier in the year. We've been to their house many times for parties and holidays. They've always welcomed us with open arms so it really is hard to stomach what Margo has done to the friendship. She has coveted their yard flamingos for a long time and was just waiting for the time to be right to take them for herself. Did I say I had nothing to do with this? Okay, just making sure.

After we were sure they were gone we brazenly pulled right into the driveway and commenced to thieving. Flo and Mingo were first in the car trunk, then CoCo. They didn't put up a fight or make any noise - probably because they're plastic and in CoCo's case made from a dead coconut. Just as we were getting ready to make our getaway their neighbor Bill pulled in behind the car, blocking the car with his pick up truck. At first he didn't recognize what was happening. He was just doing what a good neighbor would do by checking on things. We were caught red handed. Margo gave me a look of "should we take him out?" I gave her a look of "hell no, he probably has a gun."

After explaining to him what was up, and after he recognized us, we folded him into the plot. Ironically during this conversation Ted called him from the road to check on things. They talked for a bit and Ted was assured that all was well. That Bill is smooth I'll tell ya.



Anyway, the rest is history. I posted the blog post introducing our new friends and all was well. Unfortunately I failed to realize a few of things. Number one, Dawn is a regular reader of the blog and recognized her beloved birds when she saw the post. Number two, we know a really good defense attorney in town that could help us out of this mess but Dawn happens to be his paralegal.  Lastly, three, I think Ted knows some guys that could make us disappear very quietly.

We're going to give them back and hopefully the friendship will be able to be repaired. We're gotten some new flamingos to replace them, this time legitimately, paid for and everything. They arrived the other day after leaving the great plastic flamingo breeding grounds at Amazon.com. They've taken the first Flo and Mingo's place at the hitch and will do just as good a job of classing up the various places we visit.

So there ya go. If charges are filed and the heat arrives I'll be putting up a PayPal link for bail money.  Give generously.

UPDATE:  Apparently once Dawn and Ted arrived home and discovered the missing birds Dawn immediately ran to Facebook and set up a hotline for information on the return of their birds.  She even offered a 57 cent reward for their return thinking they had been kidnapped.  May I go on the record to say it was certainly not a kidnapping 'cause that's a felony -  it was merely a theft.  So Dawn, you can shut down your hotline.

Till next time.

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